insincere truth: Archive

XXX

i’m losing control. get me out.

Dec 21st

Dec 11th

XXIX

i sometimes wonder if maybe i was supposed to be alone, forever. when i’m with someone, i want to be alone. but when i’m alone, i want to be with someone. my heart can’t decide what it wants.

Dec 11th

XXVIII

i didn’t want it.

Dec 11th

Dec 5th

XXVII

the nightmares have started again. i hate you.

Dec 5th

XXVI

that kiss. our kiss. i don’t know what to think of it. i loved it. but at the same time… it was so, so wrong.

Dec 1st

Nov 27th

150 notes

XXV

i no longer trust anyone, thanks to you. and now, i forever want to be alone. he said, “i no longer want to fuck you. i want to make love to you.” i just can’t decide whether or not i should give in. i’m being indecisive again. he might help me get over you. and that’s about the only thing i need right now. you’re everywhere, and i still love you.

Nov 27th

Nov 26th

56 notes

XXIV

i don’t know what happened. suddenly i was shaking. i couldn’t walk properly, i had trouble seeing. i felt nauseous. i was terrified. it wouldn’t go away.

Nov 26th

Nov 24th

XXIII

and suddenly, it was like you were here. i could smell you, i could almost feel you. after not having you around for awhile, it was like you were back here with me, again.

Nov 24th

42 notes

XXII

i’m weird ‘cause i hate goodbyes.

Nov 24th

Nov 23rd

XXI

i miss our dysfunctional duo. the things we’d planned, what we had always wanted to do. i want it back, i want you back.

Nov 23rd

Nov 21st

XX

i still want you. i still want you.

Nov 21st

Nov 20th

293 notes

XIX

are you happy that i’m turning to alcohol, because of you? i suppose you think it’s better than self harm.

Nov 20th

XVIII

“you’re damaged as fuck and you love it.” you were always good at being straight up about everything.

Nov 20th

Nov 18th

XVII

i’m shivering uncontrollably. i still want you here.

Nov 18th

XVI

it is at this point in time, when the pain turns to hate. i want to cause you so much pain. i want to hurt you so much.

Nov 17th

Nov 16th

XV

you’re stealing all of my friends. you’re leaving me with nothing.

Nov 16th

Nov 15th

XIV

i wasn’t lying when i said i had nightmares. last night, every single one was about you. i had to double check that they were all in my imagination.

Nov 15th

Nov 14th

30 notes

XIII

i find there’s something so thrilling about playing with a boy that has a girl. it makes me a whore, a bitch, a slut, i know. but it makes my heart race, and the passion is something you just can’t chronicle. not to mention it helps me forget about you.

Nov 14th

Nov 13th

66 notes

XII

tonight, i did something i’ve always wanted to do… i sat on the floor of the shower, and let the hot water run all over me. it felt good. really good. i could’ve stayed there forever. my thoughts and i were compatible, for once.

Nov 13th

XI

i know you must think i’m heartless. but i’m not. honestly. this is hurting me as well.

Nov 12th

Nov 11th

106 notes

X

even if you haven’t actually moved on, the fact that you can function properly makes me want to cry.

Nov 11th

Nov 10th

IX

i’ll always remember our first (and last) kiss. sitting on the couch, arms around each other, our friends suddenly becoming passionate photographers. i never saw the evidence.

Nov 10th